A Strait Jacket for Your Wedding, Sis

Short Story Day 69 of 365

Photo by Renee_Olmstead_Photography on Pixabay

Keith’s wife, Gloria, made him wear the 3-piece suit to her sister’s wedding. He’d never worn a 3-piece before but that didn’t deter her from insisting there was always a first for everything. She wanted her sister’s wedding to be more special than her own.

He couldn’t figure out the vest because it was already buttoned and couldn’t be unbuttoned, so he slipped it on over his head.

That method didn’t bode well because the vest was tight and it didn’t go down over his head and shoulders. It left his arms dangling in the air, and he struggled to pull it down so that he could see what he was doing. The entire vest covered his head

When Gloria came into the bedroom, she started laughing at the sight. At the sound of her opening the door, he turned toward the door - still not being able to see anything through the vest covering his face – and lost his balance. Because he didn’t have his arms to balance him, he crashed back into the 16-cube wooden bookshelf he set up the day before. Keith slid down to the floor.

“Are you, ha ha ha, are you, ha ha, okay, ha ha?” Gloria asked.

“Very funny. Now get me out of this.”

“But I just want to capture this moment in time.”

“I can’t see you but you better put that camera away.”

“It’s just so cute, Keith. Why didn’t you unzip the vest?”

“Unzip? What do you mean, unzip the vest? It has four buttons on it. Help me get this vest off me!”

“Those are fake buttons, Honey. It’s in case you’re in a hurry, you just zip it up. No muss no fuss with the buttons. If you would’ve explored the vest a bit, you would’ve seen the zipper. Sure, a piece of cloth hides it, but it’s there. See?”

She unzipped the vest and it freed his arms.

He balled up the vest and threw it in a corner.

“Two-piece suit,” he said and she didn’t disagree.