Head and Shoulders
And he was minding his own business
“Knees and elbows, Ladies and Gentlemen, watch your knees and elbows,” the stocky flight attendant, Wendy, said every four or five seats as she pushed the beverage cart up the narrow aisle.
“Sir,” Wendy said as she approached a bald man, whose head was leaning into the aisle.
“Sir?” she said again, louder and more deliberate.
The man didn’t move.
Wendy checked her watch. On a 96-minute flight, she and four others had to serve drinks and snacks to 226 people before the plane started its descent. It was enough to accomplish under normal conditions, but this man was holding up her progress.
“Sir?” she said again, and four people within hearing distanced turned their heads. The man’s wife elbowed him, but he still didn’t respond. She nudged him again and said, “Burton! Burton!”
The man slowly lifted his head and looked over at his wife.
“Wha? What’s your problem? Whatcha want?”
“Burton, the nice lady behind you wants to push her drink cart up the aisle.”
“Why didn’t you tell me?”
“That’s why I woke you.”
Burton slowly turned his head towards the flight attendant, looked up at her and said, “’Scuse me, Ma’am. I hadn’t realized you were there. I was just engrossed in that black and white movie a couple rows up there. Fascinated really for some reason.”
“You do know you have your own screen to watch that same movie, don’t you, Sir?” Wendy said.
Burton straightened up and cleared his throat. “Yeah I know that, but I like it much better like this. Keeps me engaged.”
Wendy squinted at the 6-inch screen and saw the movie that was playing.
As she passed Burton, she leaned down and whispered, “The foreign maid did it. Everyone thinks it was the jock or the billionaire. Nope, cunning jealous foreign maid. Poison, arsenic I believe.”
“Ahh, that’s mean. Where’s my spoiler alert?” Burton said with a smile.
“We’re a full service flight crew here.”
“Yeah, I see that. That’s what I get for sticking my head into your business.”