Slow Down Already

Accident or consequence? You decide.

Going exactly 25 in a 25 mph zone was Elton Abramson to a tee.

He and his wife Gladys loved going for a nice ride in the country pretty much any day of the week. They had been going to the country weekly for the past nine years since Elton finally retired on his 75th birthday.

The Abramsons enjoyed each other, the countryside, and driving in general. With the top down on their luxury convertible, they could enjoy it all the more.

“Uh oh,” Elton said. “I see trouble in my mirror.”

Gladys looked into the mirror on her side and saw what he meant.

“They’re gaining fast, too,” said Elton. “Must be about 40 of ‘em, all with their yellow shirts and green trunks. Cute. Must be a bike club of some sort.”

“Eh, just ignore ‘em, Elton. They have to obey the speed limits too, don’t they?”

“They should but they don’t. They’re right on top of me now. It’s like they’re forcing me to go faster.”

“Hey, old man. Speed up!” one cyclist said.

Elton waved, not sure how they would interpret the wave. Then Gladys waved.

There were just enough cars in the oncoming lane to prevent the cyclists from passing. The twists and turns on the road ensured solid double yellow lines for miles.

Now another cycler chimed in and said, “Stop wasting our time and speed up. We’ve got a schedule to keep, Old Man.”

Two cyclists reached down and grabbed the back of his car and let go of their handlebars. Abramson was now towing them but he didn’t know it.

He glanced in the mirror and said, “What’re they doing? They’re gonna kill us.” He tapped his brakes and started to ease over to the shoulder. “Why are they doing that?”

A small group of cyclists weren’t able to stop in time and crashed into his car and then onto the ground. The others stopped and assisted the fallen, yelling at the Abramson car.

“Oh dear. I tapped the brakes but they were following too close. Call 911, dear,” Elton said. “I think we’re gonna have problems sorting this one out. Was I wrong?”

*******