The Muckety Mucks

The Suits versus the Workerbees...

Four regional vice presidents flew into town unannounced. They tried to blend in, but they carried a certain air about them, a pomp. These men knew they were important and wanted everyone under them to know it. They dressed in suits, but the majority in the small town they were visiting wore jeans.

Today, the muckety mucks came to inspect the restaurant. It wasn’t enough that City officials came in quarterly to inspect, and the State came in twice a year – also unannounced visits.

Somebody made a derogatory remark online about one of the restrooms a month ago, and management just now saw and acted upon the comment. It certainly wasn’t standard operating procedures for four VPs to investigate a small, local problem, but it was their one opportunity each year to meet with restaurants in outlying areas.

“We’ve got reports that the Men’s restroom was not up to Corporate standards,” Stan said to the restaurant manager, Felix.

“The issue in question was rectified as soon as the customer came to us about it,” Felix said. “He didn’t see the end result before he left, so he just posted a photo of it. Some people are like that. In fact, we had the restroom cleaned up in less than 15 minutes.”

“Beautiful. Understand the situation,” Stan, Felix’s immediate supervisor, said. “But I’d like to find out how the restroom got that way and evaluate why our procedures failed us. Perhaps we can alter those procedures to make these even more impactful across the Corporation. As you know, we have the best processes in the industry, bar none.”

Corporate and local discussed the situation a few minutes more until Corporate pulled out the procedures in question.

“Procedure 3A-1b – Restroom Cleanliness: Clean restrooms daily, more if necessary.” More detailed procedures were written for cleaning the sinks, floors, mirrors, and toilets.

“Oh, I see we are deficient in the scope of this procedure,” VP Markov said. How vague can you get? Perhaps we should clean it hourly.”

“Sir, with all due respect,” Felix said. “I don’t think that’s a good idea. How about every time an employee uses the restroom, he or she checks it for cleanliness? That way it will probably be more than hourly. To put a time table on it just burdens the employees unnecessarily. Already, we’re asking them to do a lot for what we pay them.”

“I think that’s a great idea. Employee-centric. Looking out for those in the trenches and all that. Love it. Let me get a tech writer to wordsmith it back home. By the way, sir, you really should consider a position at Corporate. We need outside-the box thinkers like you, Mr. uh, uh, uh…”

“Jones.”

“Right, Mr. Jones,” said VP Markov.

Felix smiled and said, “Ya know, Gentlemen. I appreciate the vote of confidence, but I think I’ll just stick around here and run this place for a while. I’m not a corporate guy. Never have been. Others are probably better suited for something like that. But thanks for the offer. Now, if you’ll excuse me, there are probably a few hundred things I need to tend to here.”

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