The Workplace Hazard

Short Story Day 83 of 365

Photo by PublicDomainPictures on Pixabay

“It’s just how the game’s played. It’s not fair, but what in life is fair?”

“But Pops, every time we begin eating, we’re interrupted. Every…single…time.”

“Son, look at it like this. You eat, you get exercise, you eat again, you get more exercise. That way we don’t get fat. Ever.”

“Yeah, maybe.”

“I’ve got to caution you, Son. You–we–have to always always always be on our toes when we’re eating. Did I mention always? I mean, after a little while, you get a sixth sense about the dangers, but when you’re first starting out…”

“Yeah yeah, sure. I saw what happened to Buzz and Naomi because they weren’t as fast as they needed to be.”

“I heard about them. Pity they weren’t one of mine and had this heart-to-heart before going out by themselves.”

“That’s another question I have, Pops. How do I put it? Who, um, I mean, one of ours doesn’t…don’t know why I’m having such a hard time.”

“They’re not a meal we can eat, is what you’re asking?”

“That’s exactly what I’m asking.”

“No, Son, we don’t eat our own either literally or figuratively. That’s for the lower crusts of society, the eagles and crows. We’re better than that. We’re the original full lifecycle ecologists. We clean up when others have messed up. No one is better at what we do than we are. No one. The dumber the non-human species, the better we eat. We’re Vultures, Son. And don’t you forget it.”